Christians Divorce Too

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

I am a divorced mother of two boys, now remarried to a wonderful man who has blessed me with two beautiful “bonus” daughters.

Yes, I am divorced and remarried and I am a Christian. I am loved and adored by my Savior just as any other imperfect child of God. Most of the time, “divorce” is not a word that Christians feel comfortable saying. As Christians, we believe that marriage is sacred and a lifetime commitment to one person – and it should be. The Bible indicates that marriage is intended to be a reflection of Christ’s relationship with the church. Unfortunately, we fall and we fail to perfect what God intended to be a beautiful reflection of His love. For one reason or another, divorce happens and families and relationships are impacted on all sides. Praise the Lord for His mercy and for His goodness! We can hold to God’s faithfulness in His ability to keep His promise of forgiveness. God, in His perfection, sent His Son to cover our failures, including our failure to succeed at His design for matrimonial unity.

When divorce or separation happens, it is not the end. In fact, because we have God’s promise of forgiveness, we can start anew. Does this mean that we should just jump from relationship to relationship believing its ok because God will forgive me? Absolutely not!

“Therefore, what God has joined together, let no man separate” Mark 10:9

God wants us to be faithful to His commands and make our marriage work, but divorce does happen and when it does, God wants to help us pick up the pieces.

No matter what state your marriage is in right now, God can heal it. He can restore a marriage that is hanging by its last thread. He can bring two people back together who have decided to give up and separate. He can rectify your hurts and pain from a past relationship. I have seen healing happen first hand because I have walked through these situations and continue to work through cultivating a fruitful second marriage and successful blended family. I have been through the ups and downs of rebuilding life after separation and a futile marriage. I have seen how God can take our mess and turn it into a beautiful story when we lay everything at His feet. No marriage is perfect – if it were, there wouldn’t be a need to have God’s provision and divine participation in it. The Bible states, “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Three strands – husband, wife, and God.

Regardless of how or why a “bad marriage” or divorce has happened or whose fault it is or isn’t, God wants us to give Him what’s left of our brokenness and let Him take over. As you rely on God’s sustainment, pray for all who are affected by a broken family and broken relationship. Pray that God will bring harmony to a painful situation and pray that the children will be given peace and comfort in circumstances that can often leave adolescents with scars. Pray that ex-husbands and ex-wives overcome bitterness and anger and allow Christ to intervene, filling hearts with a compassion for each other that aligns with God’s command to love one another. It is written “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind one to another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:31-32

Yes, damaged marriages and divorces do happen; even to Christians, but God can work a miracle if we put our trust in Him!